Have insomnia do you? Restricted to home after surgery or an accident? Just killing some time at work? Just washed the family dog and are waiting for her to dry off? A little depressed and need some cheering up? Nothing better to do? All are good reasons to Talk Story?

If so,,, then come "Talk Story" with us...

My rubba slippa is one good fren of mine, Wen I walk on hot pavement make me take my time, 

My good old rubba slippa, I tink reely neet, Dat bugga it help fo proteck my feet. 

I like my rubba slippa every single day, I like my rubba slippa wen I go outside fo' play, 

I need my rubba slippa fo' every step I go, 'Cause if I neva have dem, I would have to walk real slow. 

Rubba slippa, rubba slippa, I luv you 'till I die, 'Cause wen I step on kiawe, "I yie yie", I still cry! 

Da local kine stoahs carry rubba slippas in all kine size, And now even get rubba kine slippa dat geev you high skie rise.

 And nowa days, rubba slippa come in all kine colors too, So everyone kan wear dem, whether dey black, white or blue;

Some haole's call dem slip on's and some call'm jap flaps, But I still call'm rubba slippa and I give da haole one big slap!!!

Rubba slippa, rubba slippa, you do so gud fo' me, 'Specially wen I stay camping and gotta make shi-shi! 

Rubba slippa, rubba slippa, pleeze no broke again, 'Cause even if my brudda get two, he not going even lend 

So, rubba slippa, rubba slippa, please take care of us, So we no get cut and our feet and da ting no come puss! 

I hate fo' lose my rubba slippa, 'specially downtown side, 'Cause everytime I walk down 'dere, my feet get hot and fried

'An wen I go party and leave my slippa outside, Somebody always steal'm and take'm fo' one ride! '

An wen I come outside all drunk and no mo' much to care, I put on anybody's rubba slippa and get one kala-koa pair!

Even my dog like my rubba slippa, so he kan bite and chew, 'An wen I chase him for it, I everytime step in his doo-doo!

 'An wen I pau wash my feet and catch my dog at lass..., I grab my rubba slippa, 'an wack em on his ass!!!

Questions about love, marriage and sex were posed to kids ages 5 to 10. Their answers below are enlightening:

WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE??

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE??

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED??

CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE

ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE

ON THE ROLE OF GOOD LOOKS IN LOVE

CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE

THE PERSONAL QUALITIES NECESSARY TO BE A GOOD LOVER

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE?

WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU"

HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE

( Mahalo to Ka'imi for sending this story to me. We're not sure of it's origins, so mahalo to whomever wrote it ... Shaka Brah ... or Sistah! )

Wuz da nite befo' ChristmasAn' from hea to Wailuku,

No creetcha wuz stirrin'not even one uku.

Da Keikis went snuggle downSafe in da beds,

Big dreams of tofuti Went dance roun' da heads.

An' me wid my Primo An' Ma wid her poi, We jus' settle down Fo' one rap, When oh Boy!

One awful big clatter Come from da lanai, I tink maybe coconuts Wen fall from da sky.

I wen jump up so fas' I knock ova da chaia I wen run to da windo To see what stay dea.

Al ova da beach Da kine silva moonlight On da sand an' da sea It shinin' so bright,

I can see all da tingsOn da sho' plenty clea, An' I see sumting out deaDat stay mo' plenty quea!

One tiny surfboard Lyin' der on da groun' An' eight tiny sea horses Jus' swimmin' aroun'

An' one little ol surfer so lively, so quick, -I wen tink to myself,"Ey, brah! Dat Saint Nick!"

He wuz chubby an' jolly, Da kine roly poly, An' dressed all in fur Fro da chin to okole.

He had one white beard An' one little roun' belly Dat went shake when he laugh Like Tutu's guava jelly.

He wastin' no time, brah, He wen put down da sack Dat wuz big as one mountain Slung up on his back.

He got plenty good tings For all da keiki An' he wen pile dem unda Da coconut tree.

He work an' he work An' he neva pau hana Til he put someting der Fo' all da Ohana.

He wen give me one wink An' one shaka, an' - pau! Da seahorses dey know It come time to go now!

He wen pick up da board An' he run to da ocean, He wen harness da team An' he settem in motion.

Mo fasta dan jet planes Da seahorses swum He wen whistle an' shout An' he call 'em each one:

"Go Kimo, Go Noni! Gettum Kipo an' Lani! Go Kona, go Pua! Geevum Kiki an' Nani"

To da cres of da wave,Tru da foam an' da spray, Dey swimmin' like crazy, Dey flyin' away!

Til all I wen see On da wata out fa, Wuz one twinkle of light Like one dyin' out star.

But I hea ol Nick holla Across da dark sea,

"Merry Christmas, da kine Aloha Hawaii!"

It was da nite Afta Christmas And all through da Hale

Opala all over da place Eh ... somebody wen smash my new Papale...

Da keeds was playing with their Radio control Big Foot

I was searching in da fridge For what was dat bad smell ...I think it was da balut !!

Da ole lady was talking As usual on da phone Eh... I shoulda wen work... No use I stay home...

I figah I go help Clean up da mess When I sporc one unopen gift Under Da computa dess...

Was marked ... "To Daddy" In small kapakahi letters... Eh... dis was from the kids... Da former bed-wetters !!

I wen rip da bugga open I thot'... what could dis be It was wrapped in red ribbon

Da pepah kinda silvery Inside da box Was one shark bone hook Hoo da buggah was way Too shaka for look !!

The card said: "Da Hawaiian family man Always had his fish hook...To provide for his ohana From the ocean he took...

Dis frum us kids And momma too To remind you we love All the awesome stuffs you do...

Sometimes we no say How much we 'ppreciate da kine... Even when you no feel good You go work... rain or shine...

Wea dis hook proudly From us to you You da bestest Daddy And we love you too...

"Hoo... all of a sudden I get chicken skin...My ole lady and keeds wen touch My heart from within...

I said: "Honey Girl... Go call your friend bumbye... We going for one ride... Eh you kids ...you two opae.!!

We wen jump in da Blazer And spent AFTA Christmas nite... Checking out Honolulu Hale And all the Christmas lights.

It's good to tell Those that you love How much of a blessing They are.

That's the true meaning, Don't you know ... Of Mele Kalikimaka And Hau'oli Makahiki Hou.

It's the easy and quick way to converse.

English: Hello. I've been meaning to ask you exactly how old you actually are.

EhBrahnics: Howzit. What year you grad?

English: Pardon me. Your actions make me seriously doubt your manhood.

EhBrahnics: Wot. Panty?

English: That is an excellent idea. I am in full concurrence with your plan. Let's do the deal.

EhBrahnics: Shoot!

English: Excuse me, you seem to be blocking my path of travel. Would you mind stepping to the side please?

EhBrahnics: Try move.

English: Please officer, I give you my word that I will no longer travel in excess of the speed limit. I beg you not to write that ticket.

EhBrahnics: Eh, you know my uncle?

"August of 1969, a cool evening in the mountains, the fog rolling down the valleys almost to the runway. The lights of lanterns cluster near the thatch hootches. The fireplace in our old teak house glows and spits, driving away the damp coolness seeping through the closed shutters. Mike and I are sitting in wicker chairs out on the screened porch. My pipe flares in the darkness as we sip away at very generous portions of Johnny Walker Black. Down on the ramp an aircraft engine whines to life, and dies quietly as some mechanic makes a final adjustment. The end of another long day. Mike looks down at the end of the runway where the fog is turning the darkness a milky nothingness. "Only a true romantic would do this," he said. d'accord. Karl Polifka, writing about his experiences as a FAC Forward Air Controller at an undisclosed site somewhere in Laos during the Vietnam War.

"HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE"

Let's say it's 6:15 p.m. and you're driving home, (alone of course) after an unusually hard day on the job. You're really tired, upset and frustrated.

All of a sudden you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to radiate out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don't know if you'll be able to make it that far. What can you do?

You've been trained in CPR but the guy that taught the course neglected to tell you how to perform it on yourself. Many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack. Without help the person whose heart stops beating properly and who begins to feel faint has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness.

However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest. A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.

Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm.

In this way, heart attack victims can get to a phone and, between breaths, call for help.

Please tell as many other people as possible about this, it could save their lives!

Have you ever wondered what happened to the 56 men who signed the Declaration of Independence?

Five signers were captured by the British as traitors, and tortured before they died.

Twelve had their homes ransacked and burned.

Two lost their sons serving in the Revolutionary Army, another had two sons captured.

Nine of the 56 fought and died from wounds or hardships of the Revolutionary War.

They signed and they pledged their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor. What kind of men were they? Twenty-four were lawyers and jurists. Eleven were merchants, nine were farmers and large plantation owners; men of means, well educated. But they signed the Declaration of Independence knowing full well that the penalty would be death if they were captured.

Carter Braxton of Virginia, a wealthy planter and trader, saw his ships swept from the seas by the British Navy. He sold his home and properties to pay his debts, and died in rags.

Thomas McKeam was so hounded by the British that he was forced to move his family almost constantly. He served in the Congress without pay, and his family was kept in hiding. His possessions were taken from him, and poverty was his reward.

Vandals or soldiers looted the properties of Dillery, Hall, Clymer, Walton, Gwinnett, Heyward, Ruttledge, and Middleton. At the battle of Yorktown, Thomas Nelson, Jr., noted that the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson home for his headquarters. He quietly urged General George Washington to open fire. The home was destroyed, and Nelson died bankrupt.

Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed. The enemy jailed his wife, and she died within a few months.

John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she was dying. Their 13 children fled for their lives. His fields and his grist mill were laid to waste. For more than a year he lived in forests and caves, returning home to find his wife dead and his children vanished. A few weeks later he died from exhaustion and a broken heart. Norris and Livingston suffered similar fates.

Such were the stories and sacrifices of the American Revolution. These were not wild eyed, rabble-rousing ruffians. They were soft-spoken men of means and education. They had security, but they valued liberty more. Standing tall, straight, and unwavering, they pledged: "For the support of this declaration, with firm reliance on the protection of the divine providence, we mutually pledge to each other, our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor."

They gave you and me a free and independent America. The history books never told you a lot of what happened in the Revolutionary War. We didn't just fight the British. We were British subjects at that time and we fought our own government!

Some of us take these liberties so much for granted...We shouldn't.

So, take a couple of minutes while enjoying your next 4th of July holiday and silently thank these patriots. It's not much to ask for the price they paid.

LET'S ALL REMEMBER THAT FREEDOM IS "NEVER FREE."

THE MOST DANGEROUS FOODS IN HAWAII 

Naaaaaaaaa! Only in Hawaii!! Eating ANYTHING in Hawaii can be dangerous. When is the government going to learn that Hawaii residents are thrill-seekers when it comes to food? We like our eggs runny, our hot food cold, our cold food warm, our musubi 3 days old at room temperature and our takeout Zippy's chili to sit in the back of the refrigerator until it's got a little head of green, fuzzy hair. That macaroni salad isn't ready for consumption until it's sat in the hot sun on a picnic table for a couple of hours. Double- and triple-dip huli-huli chicken in the same sauce? Chance 'em, brah. Go for it! 

Salmonella is just another condiment, like that open bottle of shoyu that hasn't seen the inside of a refrigerator in three years. That shoyu isn't old, it's aged, like fine wine. Let's not even talk about rice. A rice pot can sit on a counter for days, and the rice will set up its own force field against bacteria. At least it will if it's local rice, rice that can hold together in a solid lump to fight off the enemy spirochetes and invading mold spores. With Uncle Ben's rice, each grain is separate, independent and vulnerable to viral attack. 

We like our fish raw, our hamburger blood rare and our pork cooked in the dirt with hot rocks. Sure, undercooked hamburger and runny eggs are dangerous. We don't need the federal government to tell us that. We thrive on extreme cuisine in the islands. We'll take that week-old rice, top it with that undercooked hamburger and runny egg and smother the whole mess with gravy of unknown origin and call it loco moco. It's not dangerous, it's BREAKFAST. 

Because we are living la vida loco moco, my friend. You catch a fish off the reef that might have some toxin that will never leave your body for the rest of your life? Toss that buggah on the hibachi. What's a little nerve or liver damage when it comes to ono pupus? The federal weenies can take their warnings about eating runny eggs and hang'em up with ducks in Chinatown. 

A state law requiring Spam musubi to be refrigerated? Are you mad? Spam has an unrefrigerated half-life longer than plutonium. Spam is EMBALMED with salt. If they had buried an open can of Spam with King Tut, it would still be edible today (not to mention, tasty). In Japan they are selling something called "Godzilla Meat." It's actually canned corned beef, which is more dangerous than actual giant angry dinosaur meat any day. In Hawaii we eat canned corned beef from Ecuador, man. God knows what's actually in that stuff because they don't even raise cows in that country. It must be King Kong Meat or something. But it's all good. 

Eating dried plum pits that have sat in giant jars at Ala Moana Center for decades is a test of will that no other state in the country would attempt or can match. Raw squid that has been dried and shredded up into nasty, gnarly-looking yellow strings are chewed like gum. Cover it with some crushed kukui nut, and if it turns dark, you can use it as a torch. Wait for fruit to ripen? No way, pal. Pick those mangoes green and soak 'em a year in vinegar. Ono Sonny Bono, brah. 

Still looking for action? Risk being beaten to death by waves to pry thorny little opihi from lava rocks so you can suck 'em up with beer. Spare us your health warnings. Pass the pickled pigs feet, the balut, poke and fish roe the size of marbles. We celebrate the most dangerous food in the world. Brah! Dees is Hawaii."